!@#%* Quilt

Ah, quilting, it’s so relaxing…said no perfectionist ever.  I should know, for I am their queen.  I know for sure I picked the wrong hobby when choosing the right thread color to quilt the dang thing is almost more than I can manage.  Today’s quilted offering resulted in much tossing about of material and supplies and cursing fit to make even a salty dog blush.  Score one for me and nominate me for Mother of the Year.  The Diva mentioned the avalanche of crap strewn about the floor and said it must’ve fallen.  I wasn’t about to offer up that I shoved the shit down there and found what I was looking for in the drawer after the fact.  I’m all for teachable moments, just not ones that involve me looking like a complete jackass.  Yay me.

This quilt is the twin to the one featured in my last post…you know the one…all that pink princess-y perfection.  I had to perform an exorcism on Captain Jack after I was finished with that one and he’s moving along just fine and dandy now if you ignore his occasional obstinacy with regard to moving when I put the pedal to the metal.  I smack him around a bit and off he goes at my command.  Don’t say anything to him, but I think he’s been reading the Fifty Shades trilogy, the dirty bird.


What little boy could resist Hot Wheels cars?  Not the recipient I hope.  I fully intended to perform the same flip, fold and sew routine for the binding as on the princess quilt.  That was the plan anyway.  I was grumpily sewing along, all the while thinking that the job looked like something the cat barfed up.  It was fugly.  Like Carrot Top in a Speedo fugly.  What to do?

I formulated a plan and sat in the pickup line at school ripping out all those stitches with a seam ripper than can only be described as a miniature scimitar.  No wonder no one approached my vehicle to chat.  I wound up ragging the edges, ran it through the washer/dryer and voila, a finished quilt!


Ignore the stray threads, por favor.  And yes, that’s just about the limits of my Spanish, unless you want me to call you something trashy.  You’re welcome.  Here’s a sneak peek of a little special something on the backing…


I’ll leave you to guess what the child’s name is and, no, it’s not Thor or Wolverine.

All in all, I’m happy with it or maybe that’s just the feeling of ‘Thank you, sweet baby Jesus, it’s done’.  Whatever helps me sleep at night.  Oh, wait, that’s wine.  Haha.


It’s off to bed I go, perchance to dream, but most probably to snore.




  1. I’m doing a quilt as you go quilt for my daughter that I have adapted from a lap quilt pattern. Will probably end up queen size. So far the tracks don’t line up though. Damn. I hate when things look so much better in my head.

  2. I gUess you didn’t make a block with the quilt name to add to the back. I like it. Some boy should be happy.

    I thought I left the snoring behind but alas, it’s with me again. Awoke from a weird dream and there it is. I think my night is done. Can I get by with running out to the car in my moose jams for fabric to cut? I don’t want arrested in Mt Pleasant, Texas.

    • Texans tend to leave odd folks alone and let ’em do their thing. It gives us something to talk about.

      And no, I didn’t put a label on the back.

  3. I love that Mary had to go to her car to get fabric to cut. Great new place to hide/store fabric. Mine has huge trunk!

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